Monday, February 23, 2009

Just another day....

And I'm packing for Dom's big trip tomorrow to see the paediatric surgeon. Hopefully he'll agree to circumcise for his phimosis and we can stop worrying about UTI's!!! Our appointment is at 9.30am so we'll be staying at mums over night and leaving at 5am *yawn* I just pray it's going to be worth the trip - I've started to doubt myself a little again with crappy doctors etc - It's strange, I know in my head what is going on, what should be done etc etc etc - but the minute we come against any for of resistance such as a dodgy doctor who is patronising my resolve crumbles. At times it's as though I have no backbone - which I know is incorrect.

It makes me wonder, and I tired do I really have such little self confidence that someone's not thought out comments are enough to erode my own beliefs?? And for that matter am I depressed again but just putting on a good front - so good that I've been fooling myself again??

To be honest some things at the moment I could just sit and cry over - but I wont let myself cry - it's a sign of weakness - stiff upper lip and all that.... I just feel so close to the edge at the moment, edgy, jumpy, nervous, almost teary... if one more thing goes wrong I feel it could tip me over - but does that mean that there is something wrong or am I normal??? I'm certainly not ready to return to work and deal with other peoples problems at the moment!!

Anyways I'd better get back to packing and working out what we need to take before I get too introspective and blue ;)

BTW Discovered I am responsible for 'pest control' at this place so need to get the house fumigated myself *sob* quotes so far around the $200 - $250 mark!!!! Then I have to fumigate again when I move in 7 or so weeks!! Not sure if I can afford that so might have to put up With the bloody ants :(

Something to smile at ...

~ Domenik 22-02-09 ~

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