Monday, October 25, 2010

uh-oh...

I've been told that apparently my blog post yesterday was a little harsh... Well, maybe... I mean I do have a terminal case of verbal diarrhoea when I let my thoughts ramble and I just type away... LOL

Anyhoos, I don't want to really make this blog about my old friendship - I mean we had good times, we had a lot of down times and it was what I thought was a good friendship, until someone changed her mind and became influenced by others around her and started talking out of school. She chose to change to a point where she was using profane language to my mother and telling my mum to f*** off... Now, I'm sorry but in my book that is something that is borderline forgivable but not forgettable, and there is no way I could associate with anyone who has not only spoken to me like that but also my mother

On top of that saying one thing to a persons face and another behind their back was starting to gripe on me, everything added up - so yes, we had what I believed to be a good and close friendship, but the minute I wasn't able to live in her pocket day in and day out her attention turned elsewhere and everything we supposedly had was rubbished, abused and pushed aside - and excuses came flooding forth as to why this was all happening - in an attempt to push the blame back onto me. I can't go forward with a friendship like that... That is why I was so happy and relieved when I was shown these photo's that I felt nothing. I knew that I had moved on. I am ready to continue my life with this friendship being a part of my past. It and she is not a part of my future and I accept that and am happy with that.

I don't want to come across as a nasty pasty who has celebrated wiping someone out of their life for nothing - believe me I'm not like that. I know that if you're my friend I'll hold onto you as tightly as possible and it takes a lot for me to loosen that grip on you (be warned mwahahaha) but start to turn on me and my loyalty will be questioned... Be abusive towards my family and you're gone - especially when they've done nothing but drop everything to be by your side and support you, babysit for you, shelter you, stop you from doing stupid things when wanting to end your life, answer your tearful calls at midnight after your ex abused you and run to your side at all hours - yes that was not only me but also my mum and this was the thanks we received... Sorry but do that and I know that you're not the right sort of person to be in my life... THAT is what yesterdays post was all about.

Sorry for not being too clear, I'm not nasty, just a human being who is moving forward with her life :)

Onwards and Upwards - I soooo am loving that saying hahaha BTW remember my mantra - "You don't always get answers for what happens - because sometimes the answers were not for you, they were lessons for someone else..." I really do think that was the case here... I can only hope that what happened the answer was for me to be there to help her get through this stage in her life, now it's time for me to move on and start with my own life - it's the least I can do for myself and my family :)
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